Homo Marriage Coming to Washington State

Marcus Bachmann is furious about this news.

We all know the gays.

We all fear the gays.

They are bringing down our society with their gayey gayness and their finely tailored J. Crew suits. Hell, if the hordes of homos could pull themselves away from Barefoot Contessa and Banana Republic catalogs, they could start to do some serious damage to this great-n-straight nation of ours that celebrates the awesomeness of penis in vagina.

In the state of Washington, that could all change. Seattle? More like Gayattle.

Washington’s Legislature now has enough votes to legalize gay marriage.
Democratic Sen. Mary Margaret Haugen says she will support the measure, becoming the 25th vote needed to pass the bill out of the Senate. The House already has enough support, and Gov. Chris Gregoire has endorsed the plan.

Washington would become the seventh state to legalize same-sex marriages, following New York, Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts, New Hampshire and Vermont.

Bad, bad news. Frightening. What in the world is Washington thinking? It’s bad enough they give us the Seahawks, but this? It could be devastating.

Also, there could be seven states where these lesbos and gaylords can tie the knot (it’ll probably be a really neat knot).

I’m gonna faint.


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